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Showing posts from 2013

I got your resolutions right here!

Like it or not, New Year's Day is upon us, and it's time to start thinking about how you can be a better person in the year to come.  Whether you make new year's resolutions or not, you have to admit that the middle of winter is a perfect time for self-reflection.  It's dark, it's cold, and there's really very little else to do.  Plus, assuming that you follow a solar calendar of some kind, there's that whole end of the year thing.

It's not easy, it may not even be fun, but this is the time: you need to become a better you.  But this year is different!  No, you're still going to break that promise to eat healthily by halftime of the Rose Bowl.  This year is different because I've done the work for you!  I've already figured out what all your resolutions need to be.  All you have to do is keep reading.  You can thank me in the comments.

Now, before we get into what we will do to become better, more enlightened, and healthier people in 2014, l…

Hollywood.bomb, Chapter 13

Chapter 13 

"It isn’t time to bring in the bullpen already, is it?"  Jack’s voice crackled through Stephen’s headphones as he prowled around the parking lot outside CouldBU’s office.  As usual, Jack was making no attempt to hide his enjoyment of Stephen’s discomfiture.  "Kinda makes you appreciate those guys who start projects, doesn’t it?"

"I don’t know about ‘appreciate,’ but it does make me want to buy them a sympathy beer the next time I see them," said Stephen, "and maybe apologize to Miller for calling his mother a whore.  Does every project go horribly wrong at some point?"

"No, not every one," Jack said, then he thought about it for a moment.  "Actually, yes, every one.  Every project spends most of its existence teetering on the edge of oblivion, like a train riding on only one rail.  It’s your job to keep the team balanced and on the track or you’ll end up with a front-row seat to a fiery train wreck.  It’s my job to try…

Dr. Seuss Meets the School Bus

"It's time to go!" yelled the Mom up the stairs.
"Hold on," cried the daughter, "I'm doing my hair!"
The son's only answer was a noisy flush.
Then a muffled voice called, "Have you seen my brush?"

"We have to go. You'll be late for school!"
"Mom, where's my sweatshirt? Does this hat look cool?"
"I can't find my socks.  Oh, look, there's the dog!
She's so cute! I'll post a pic on my blog!"

"My socks don't match.  What'd you do with my pants?"
"Do you think if we dressed her in a tutu she'd dance?"
"Hey, there's my glove!  I thought it was lost!"
"Mom, how much does a dog tutu cost?"

The Mom called again in a voice of despair,
"You're going to be late.  Don't you two even care?"
Oh the places you'd go.  Oh the things you could see,
If you'd just leave the house.  Won't you listen to me?"

The c…

Lessons From the Field

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It happens every year: a sports team pulls together, overcomes incredible odds, and wins a national championship.  Their fans go wild, strangers hug each other, and parades are planned.  Then, without fail,  the "more important things" crowd shows up.

"Imagine," they say, "what these people could do if they got this excited about something that really mattered, like [insert cause here]."

Cue the sad trombones.

I have a fundamental problem with this statement, for several reasons.

First, if people aren't excited about your cause, then maybe there's something wrong with your delivery.  When was the last time that people cheered someone for haranguing them?

"You're a worthless pack of human beings and you're all going to hell if you don't do exactly as I say!"
"Yay…"  "How's that hamburger tasting?  Did you know that 100,000 children starved to death in the time that it took you to swallow that mouthful of proc…

Hollywood.bomb, Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Stephen awoke early the next morning with the sunlight streaming through his windows.  It was too early for breakfast, but he didn’t care.  For the first time in weeks, he felt rested and alive.  He briefly considered getting up to join Mark in his morning swim, but decided that he would rather lie in bed for a while and enjoy the fact that he didn’t need to be up yet.

Two hours later he breezed into the office, whistling an old sea shanty that his father had taught him.  He could never remember all of the words, but recalled that they had something to do with a sailor getting his oar stuck in the wrong lock.  It didn’t really matter:  the tune was cheerful, his headache was gone, and all was right with the world.  Peeking into the offices as he went by, he saw that he was the first one in.  He hadn’t really expected anyone from CouldBU to be up this early, but was a little surprised that no one else from ADD was running on Eastern time, too.

Stephen shrugged as he entered…

Hollywood.bomb, Chapter 11

It's been a while but I'm back with another chapter.  If you want to catch up, there's a handle table of contents available to help.  On we go with the further adventures of our intrepid Bostonians in La-La Land….

Chapter 11


"Are you coming, Frank?"  Stephen looked back over his shoulder and saw Frank gazing thoughtfully into the sky.  "You’re going to fry your retinas if you keep looking at the sun like that, shades or no shades."

"Hmm?  Oh yeah, I’m coming.  I was just contemplating some upgrades."

"To what?"

"My wearable computer.  Don’t worry about it; it won’t take time away from work."

"It’s not the work time I’m worried about.  It’s the time in the hospital that always gets us."  Stephen held the door for Frank and waved him through.

Frank made a face as he went by.  "Ha, ha, and ha.  You’re never going to let me forget that, are you?"

"Nope."

The ADD team walked through the building toge…