Gov't to America: You're Fat AND Stupid

Government Urges Most Americans to Cut Calories

WASHINGTON - The government on Wednesday urged most Americans to eat fewer calories and exercise 30 to 90 minutes a day, updating guidelines that advised people to lose weight but gave few specifics on how to do it.

Federal officials acknowledged that much of the advice will not be new to Americans, who spent millions on diet books trying to lose weight.

"It's really common sense. Do you want to look better? Do you want to feel better?" Health and Human Services Secretary Tommy Thompson said. "You lower your calorie intake, you lower your carbs, your fats. You eat more fruits and vegetables, and you exercise. That's as simple as it can be. That is not too hard."

"You people are really stupid, aren't you?" he added. "What, did you think that Super Size Me was an instructional video?"

When asked for comment, Americans tried to voice their outrage, but their mouths were full.
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